Beauty is Found in Self-Confidence – Never the Other Way Around
Who Do You Admire?
Picture someone you know who you admire. Someone who you think is beautiful from the inside-out. I’m talking pure gold, not gold-plated people.
What are five words that come to mind when you think of that person?
Is Confident one of them? Self-aware? Driven? Passionate? Kind? Loving of others and of self? Compassionate and empathetic? Do they have a big heart? Maybe a great sense of humor?
What about Skinny? Muscular? Tanned? Wrinkle-free? Nice hair? Perfect makeup? Nice clothes? No, none of those made the list?
Have you ever stopped to think about where confidence comes from? People who just “have” it – how did they get it?
Where Confidence Is Born
When someone is vulnerable enough to show the world who they truly are – that is where confidence is born, and through that confidence is where beauty lives.
It’s not in the size of their waist, but in the self-awareness they have around who they are as a person. Self-confidence can be quiet, or it can be loud. It isn’t found in boldness – it is found in authenticity. The ability to be who you truly are without apology.
So then, how do you develop confidence?
Through being your authentic self and becoming that best version of you.
Is Your Environment Conducive To Confidence?
I see it every day on the gym floor – the ultimate setting of raw emotion. Its where we see walls broken down and strength built back up in their place. Where we see who people truly are without them even realizing it. It’s amazing the transformation that can happen when you put someone in the right environment and repeatedly ask them to step outside their comfort zone. Eventually it becomes comfortable as they begin to realize that “I am safe here”, “no one is judging me”, “I can be authentic”.
Of course, it only works that way if you want it to.
The gym can also be a place of judgement and vanity – a place where insecurities breed insecurities and where we never quite feel good enough. “Look at her, she doesn’t even know what she’s doing”, “oh my god you can see my tummy rolls through this shirt, what was I thinking wearing this”, “he’s grunting so loud, who does he think he is”, “I hope no one notices me over here, don’t make eye contact with anyone”… that little voice can cripple us – these words we speak about others are usually the insecurities we feel about ourselves showing through.
Don’t Get Stuck In The “I’ll be confident when…” Trap
That’s the thing about confidence. It’s not wearing a sports bra and short shorts and parading your body around for everyone to see. It’s smiling to someone who feels lost in the gym. Its high-fiving someone for their hard work instead of judging their outfit. It’s showing yourself to the world and feeling good about that person. If you’re ready to try it, but you don’t know how – I suggest you find your “place”. Somewhere you can put yourself out there without worry of judgement. Confidence doesn’t come from vanity, but this is the mistake many make. We tell ourselves that “when I’m a size 0 I’ll feel more confident”.
No – when you learn to love yourself exactly as you are you’ll be more confident. When you place your self worth in what you can do rather than what you look like, you’ll be more confident. And when you stop comparing your body to all the other beautiful bodies around you – you’ll be more confident.